QUESTION #1: Tell me, is there really love after death???
SENT BY: Anonymous
ANSWER: Smartazz.
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QUESTION #2: How can I get my lady to do anal sex for the first time???
SENT BY: Anonymous
ANSWER: First off, you have to be able to communicate with her... This meanz that you actually have to talk to her, pendejo. You can't just expect a woman to want a dick in her azz just because you want to put it there. The main thing iz that she'z gotta be comfortable with you first... She'll have to know that she can trust you... So talk about it before you actually ever do anything...
Before having any actz of Muddy Love, try getting her used to anal attention first. Start out with a well lubricated finger inserted into her Browneye when she'z cumming (or peaking, since we all know that some femalez are unable to climax)... But don't just shove it in. You gotta "rim" her a little with the fingertip and caress it. If she'z not into having a finger back there, then you can just forget about anal sex... If she'z not into it, there'z no way she'z taking anything else up there no matter how good at fucking you think you are. If she likez it, then you can take it further... Try this a few timez during sex before you actually try anal sex.
Note: Ey, pendejoz... Make sure your fingernailz are alwayz properly clipped and filed smooth... You don't want to cut her... It could cause much discomfort including burning when lubrication iz applied.
When she finally feelz like she'z actually ready to try full anal sex, double down on the foreplay. Lot'z and lotz of foreplay... This will help her relax... And when I say "foreplay", I don't mean two minutez of kissing and two minutez of undressing... Don't be stupid by rushing thingz... Take your time. She'll never try it again if her first time iz a bad experience, so unless you want her first time to be your last, don't fuck it up!
Once she feelz she'z ready (wait for her to give the "greenlight"), lube up her Balloon Knot along with your dick. For some extra romantic intimacy point, you can lube eachother up.
To help stretch the hole out a little to decrease the chance of irritating friction during initial penetration, lube a finger up (yourz or herz, depending on who wantz to go digging) and then slowly insert the finger... This technique can also help by adding additional lubrication inside the rectum to ensure an easier entry.
Note: Silicone-based lubrication iz meant for anal sex... Water-based lubrication iz meant for vaginal sex.
She needz to be 100% relaxed before you go any further... Assume whatever position you choose that iz most comfortable for you and her...
Some women prefer the "cowgirl" position (female on top facing the male) so that she will be able to control the depth, by being able to simply lift herself off if it getz uncomfortable... This position can also keep her in control to make sure that the guy does not go too deep and hurt her.
If she doesn't like this position, try the "spooning" position (doggystyle position but laying on your sidez).
Once she'z ready for penetration, she needz to take a deep breath as you slowly push it in... Concentrating on her breathing can help keep her relaxed. Don't shove it all in at once. Gently push the dick in inch by inch. Sometimez it may hurt her due to whatever position you're in so just take it out and try again until she feelz more comfortable.
Once it'z in, don't start banging away... Leave it in without thrusting for a minute to give her body a chance to adjust to the change and to stretch. When she'z ready, begin to thrust slowly and then gradually build up at her command. She can put a hand on your hipz and guide you along at the speed she iz most comfortable with.
If at any time she sayz "It hurtz"... STOP!!! There'z no reason for her to be in any major pain if you're doing it right. Pull out, and try again... Sometimez a change of position can make a major difference... But if she continuez to feel any discomfort, then something'z wrong and you should not continue... There'z no rush... If she'z willing, try it again another time.
Remember, if she'z hurting... It doesn't alwayz mean that you don't know what you're doing. Some guyz dickz are just too big to put in tight little virgin assez... So don't be discouraged... Be proud... Of course, that'z only for some of the guyz out there... So don't bullshit yourselvez.
But if she does enjoy it... Then do the damn thang...
For health reasonz, never take your dick out of her azz and then insert it into her pussy without proper cleansing for any reasonz whatsoever. This mistake can lead to some serious healthy issuez... And besidez... One asshole iz enough.
Note: Ladiez, if you plan on giving your man some Muddy Love, please take a shit or give yourself an enema one or two hourz before... Yes, sex can be more romantic when it'z spontaneous... But there'z nothing romantic about a spontaneous "accident" if you have anal sex with a hot one in the chamber. Just make sure the road iz all cleared ahead for him.
Remember to clean up properly after you're done. Don't be lazy. It'z a small price to pay for getting your Twinky stinky.
And finally... Remember to keep a rag nearby for accidentz... (SHIT HAPPENZ)... Never look down.
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QUESTION #3: Do guys really like anal sex, or is it just something they feel like they have to try because pornos say so?
SENT BY: clubjenny@MySpace.com
ANSWER: (Coming Soon)
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